An Alternative Story for 2020's Very Strange St. Patrick's Day

This St. Patrick’s Day, when the pubs of Ireland, Boston, and New York are closed, travel from Europe is suspended, and the whole world is gripped in a terrible kind of uncertainty, I need to tell a story about the day I worked a magic spell while driving a tiny car down the left side of the road.

This story is proof that magic and Sovereignty are all around us, even when pandemic has disrupted life as we know it and we’re on the couch with a can of Guinness, wishing we were out at the pub with friends or taking a flight on Aer Lingus.

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It was an indifferent sort of Irish morning, a bit of gray sweater weather that didn’t necessarily promise sunshine or rain. It was enough for us. We were tourists with a warm, dry car who’d just had a full breakfast, complete with black pudding, fried up for us in a big house in County Mayo. The hospitality was a blessing to be sure, but we needed to be in Roscommon by noon. I wanted to get out of this twenty-first century castle and into the wilds. Someone was waiting for us, and he promised to show us a place that was at once the birthplace of the goddess and the gateway to hell.

When my aunt, my twenty-something cousin, and my eight-year- old daughter finally got into the car, I was tight lipped and silent. Every part of me was on the move—except my actual body that had to sit in the driver’s seat as everyone wedged their American luggage into a European car. With about four days of experience driving on the left side of narrow roads, I was finally ready to drive the speed limit—and exceed it. But with all the twists and turns and crowded main streets that stretched between us and the village of Tulsk, I realized that no amount of white-knuckle speeding (and “Oh, Jesus, Marisa, that was close!” comments) could get us there on time.

There was nothing to do but practice some magic.

I’d tried this before when I was back home in the Hudson Valley. Then, I’d wanted to save my daughter from that dreaded feeling of being the last one left at the curb. Do you remember the waves of rage and fear of abandonment that used to wash over you before you had a concept of traffic or understood that your mother had more to do than wait for you to be done with school? Those kid fears still burn in me, and I’d do a lot to save my girls from such experiences, but my worries about their righteous indignation was nothing compared to what I was feeling here on the N60 road. We were speeding to the place I was most eager and most afraid to explore, and I couldn’t stand to miss it just because my family needed to graze a table heavy with bacon and eggs and have just one more cup of tea.

And so, I started working on the underside of time.

My hands were on the steering wheel, but my fingers were actually wrapped around the knots of energy that lay beneath the surface of the earth. I was trying to find the strands of time and space that are layered beneath our understanding of the moment. I was tugging at the fabric of the universe, and though I had no idea what I was doing, somehow I understood exactly how it had to be done. Clearly, I was messing with something bigger than me, something that would have consequences. Though I’ve long been someone who likes to talk about magic, I have rarely gathered the courage or the focus to risk the doing of it. That’s the tricky thing about believing in magic—you’re also wise enough to be a little bit afraid of it, or at least in awe of it. If “magic is the art of changing consciousness at will,” I need to admit that I’m both excited and terrified of change and the mystery of consciousness. But then, Sovereignty relies on recognizing your own power to shift your experience by shifting your perceptions. The real trick of magic (and Sovereignty) is simply in believing you know how and then giving it a try.

Was I actually altering the space-time continuum as we sped to County Roscommon? Was there any risk of changing the distant future or somehow shortening my own life as I attempted to stretch and fold time on this particular April morning? Or was I just soothing my own frustrations with fantasies that I could use the power of my intentions to slow the clock or move the ponderous truck to the shoulder of the road?

All I know is that it worked.

Moira at Rathcroghan in Co. Roscommon, April 2018

Because I focused less on worry and more on magic, my family was spared the nasty sounding “hurry up” that welled in my throat. Added bonus: I felt like a sorceress (and proved myself to be a badass “wrong side of the road” driver). Most importantly, we ended up beating our guide to the meeting point and we were set for a day that would change my consciousness in powerful, lasting ways.

If you want to credit our peaceful, timely arrival to my self-control, luck, and coincidence, be my guest, but honestly, I think you get more out of calling it magic. This “what you see is what you get” perspective on the world never explains all the miracles, synchronicities, and sacred experiences we witness every blessed day. Stubborn pragmatism labels these moments of wonder and connection as mere whimsy, delusion, or child’s play, but that approach robs us of the best parts of being alive. Sovereignty is about rooting into real life and transforming suffering, division, and oppression. Sovereignty, as I choose to define and embody it, is also about conspiring with your imagination to reach spiritual depths and mysteries unseen.

As you come to believe in your own inherent power and get to know the Sovereignty archetypes that dwell within, you’ll realize that talking to goddesses and focusing energy on changing your own consciousness in order to change the world is more potent than sheer practicality and planning alone ever could be. The magic that lets us manipulate time and space might not quite look like stepping through the standing stones and entering another century like they do in Outlander, but it looks everything like the life I crave. Real life is full of real magic and it’s available to all of us who dare to look for it, treasure it, and conjure it.

Want to find out where those Irish country roads took us? Get a copy of The Sovereignty Knot today.

This is an except from The Sovereignty Knot: A Woman’s Way to Freedom, Power, Love, and Magic.

You can get the ebook from Amazon.

Or, please consider supporting your local bookshop by asking them to order you a copy. You can buy The Sovereignty Knot from my local store, Inquiring Minds of New Paltz by calling 845-255-8300. (They’re offering free shipping through the US while they’re closed due to the Coronavirus).

Storytelling in the Time of Pandemic: Words Heal, Community Heals

This week, I came across the image of a sacred well in Rome, a great city in the midst of a country shut down by the Coronavirus. I posted it on Instagram with a version of these words:

And still we go to the healing well to wash away the fear and to become whole again...⁣⁣

This global illness, with all its fear and consequences, is asking us to fight and surrender all at the same time.⁣⁣

We fight with hand sanitizer and knuckles raw from washing.⁣⁣

⁣⁣We surrender to the closures and cancellations and the belief that distance is the way to maintain community.

Throughout it all, we are called to pull on our own wells of wisdom. ⁣⁣We are called to know when to refuse to fight and when to refuse to surrender.

⁣⁣Do not fight against a relentless tide that will only exhaust and stress you and compromise your immune system. ⁣⁣Do not fight against your own intuition that guides you, whether it urge you to stay away or to show up and offer aid.

⁣Do not surrender to the urge to hoard, to become suspicious, to lose hope. 

Do not surrender to the belief that contagion is inevitable, disruption is catastrophic, and use any of this as an excuse to stop doing your good work. ⁣⁣

⁣⁣We need you, the healer, the creative entrepreneur, the transformation professional now that ever. 

Care for yourself and your dearest ones. Keep showing up for your wider network to share truth and hope and compassionate good sense.⁣⁣

Play with the urge to fight and the need to surrender.

Soften. Release. Heal. Continue this quest to become Sovereign and whole.

⁣⁣In this second edition of the Sovereign Standard, you’ll find a small collection of don’t-miss (virtual) events,  meaning-filled articles, great listens, and important books that will help you live and tell a more powerful story in the midst of all this disruption.

Mark Your Calendar

Join the free, online community writing practice session coming up on Tuesday, March 17.

This is your time to “write it out as we ride it out.” Together, we’ll take to the page so you can get clear on what you're worried about, what you believe in, and what you need to do to be part of the collective healing and renewal.

Online learning will be more important than ever in the weeks to come. (See the note at the end of this message about how I am committed to making the Stand In Your Sovereign Story online program accessible to you, even though you might we worried about how the virus is impacting your economic situation.)

Flourishing Center CEO & Founder, Emiliya Zhivotovskaya is offering a free an online workshop on How to Create Online Workshops. Emiliya is an expert in positive psychology and has a remarkable knack for creating community.

Good Reads

COVID-19, Anxiety, and Other Contagions by Sara Eisenberg of A Life of Practice offers “fortune cookie and other wisdom for moving with life when ‘the new normal’ changes six times before breakfast.” It’s also a vulnerable look at our biases, against the body and against those who are labeled “other.”  

My post from early this week, Storytelling & the Art of Life-Changing Magic seems almost quaint now, as I share the story about rediscovering the performer within me after more than twenty years away from the stage.

As everything from St. Paddy’s Day parades to sports seasons are being cancelled, it’s unclear whether I’ll be putting on the Sovereignty Knot show as planned on March 28, but I keep reminding myself that this is a lovely concern to have since it’s so easily rescheduled to when the time is right.

Good Listens

I’ve got Glennon Doyle’s Untamed in my earbuds this week. It’s exactly the break I need from the NPR headlines. I’m worried I’m bingeing it and it will be over too soon. Then I realized that I totally have permission to listen again.

Good Book

I am immersing myself in Theodora Goss’s Snow White Learns Witchcraft. Right now, we need stories that are encoded into our culture that are all spiked with modern imagination.

Final Note on Staying Nimble in a Changing World

I know that just about all of our businesses will be affected by this Coronavirus. Clients will cancel and will be afraid to commit resources to anything that doesn’t seem “essential.” This becomes an important time to plant new seeds, turning inward for a time before we all emerge again.

Please know that I am committed to offering the Stand in Your Sovereign Story online program as planned on April 14. And, I also committed to including all who want to be there, even though the financial situation seems unsure.

If you’re curious about the program but have not felt ready to commit, please reach out to me and we’ll talk about a “pay what you can model” that feels doable and nurturing.

Storytelling and the Art of Life-Changing Magic

Storytelling is an act of reclaiming yourself across time

When you tell a story, you have access to:

• Your past: the power and potential that you once possessed

• Your present: the work you’re here to do and the people you’re here to touch now

• Your future: the vision of a reality that’s more more beautiful, bearable, and bold for yourself and all people

Storytelling is an act of time magic

When you tell a story, you are consciously bringing the past, present, and future together into an eternal now. 

While writing or speaking a story out loud, you are able to anchor fully into the present moment. You reflect back on events of the past, crafting the story of who you were and you who are so that you can transform the future.

If storytelling isn’t like casting a spell, then I have no idea what magic is. (And really, I have spent a lot of time thinking about creative magic, so I feel like I do have a pretty profound understanding of this stuff.)

How to make this past-present-future storytelling magic into something real

In the big story I’ve just put into the world, The Sovereignty Knot, I’m definitely reclaiming the narrative in my own life in hopes that it will inspire my readers to do the same. And there’s definitely a lot of time magic going on.

In the book, you meet the past, present, and future me. Writing this story gave me the chance to connect to all that I was, all that I am, and all that I would be, and integrate it all into one cohesive narrative. Into one cohesive life.

In The Sovereignty Knot, you also meet the archetypes of Sovereignty…

There’s the princess - she’s the one who embodies your sexy, brave, carefree parts

There’s the queen - she’s the one who embodies your capable, responsible, compassionate parts

Then, there’s the wise woman - she’s the one who embodies your still, irreverent, insightful parts

And here’s the most important thing about these archetypes of Sovereignty: you can (in fact you must) work with them and play with them throughout life.

The princess, queen, and wise woman are a vibrant alternative to that linear model of the maiden, mother, and crone. Rather than passing from one stage to the next and letting the doors slam behind us, I want all of us to keep dancing with all the energies these archetypes offer - the adventurous, the competent, and the wise.

Embodying all three archetypes of Sovereignty regardless of age or stage of life is a practice. The best way to get good at it is to explore your own stories.

Telling my story is enabling me to reclaim my original magic

This kind of Sovereign Storytelling Time Magic works. Not just on the page, but in the “real world” too. Telling a story can transform the way you show up everywhere.

I grew up on a stage. I learned how to be Sovereign on a stage.

Dancing, acting, and singing… When I stood up there I gave myself permission to use my full voice, use all my energy, and to inhabit my full potential. My princess self was on a great adventure. Being that kind of brave in front of so many people was my kind of intoxicating.

In that high school auditorium, I was unafraid to take up space and take over the room. The curtains went up and I knew I was meant to be queen, all full of confidence and the power to captivate an audience.

Did the wise woman within me get up on that stage too? Well, I did play Ebenezer Scrooge (in a gown!) my senior year… But then came graduation, and I didn’t feel like I could compete with the “real” theater kids in college. I retired long before my wise woman ever had a chance to claim the spotlight.

Leaving childhood and those leading roles behind, I dedicated myself to learning other people’s stories. I earned degrees in English and learned how to analyze the hell out of a piece of literature. I worked in a library, taking care of a million other people’s books. Eventually, I’d become a writer-for-hire and then a coach, helping other people sculpt their own stories.

In the background, Sovereignty kept tugging at my sleeve. The archetypes showed up and wouldn’t go away. I had no choice but to set aside all the excuses and become the heroine of my own story again, writing about my experiences and stitching them together into a book.

The book, of course, is evidence that writing does give us the power to reach back into the past to understand ourselves more fully in the present in order to create a new future.

And here’s one more piece of evidence: I’m getting back on stage again.

I am putting on a show… 

I would love to have you there as I perform these archetypes of Sovereignty and tell the old Celtic stories that inspired them. 

Though I have only been on a stage a couple of times in the last twenty years, I am more ecstatic than nervous. I am so excited for this experiment in Sovereignty.

The princess in me can’t wait to see how brave and bold she can be. The queen is thrilled that I’ve got the skills and the presence to gather people together in the name of Sovereignty. The wise woman within me is so glad she’ll finally be able to be part of the act, offering her insight and her experience to this grown-up version of Marisa, the performer.

If you live in the Hudson Valley, I do hope you’ll join us at The Living Seed in New Paltz on March 28.

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Do you want to learn how to uncover your stories and how to craft and share them with the people who most need to hear you message?

Learn more about the Stand in Your Sovereign Story Program. The early bird registration rate is still available!

The Sovereign Standard: I’ll Tell You My Sovereign Stories So You Can Tell Yours

There’s a section in the first chapter of The Sovereignty Knot: A Woman’s Way to Freedom, Power, Love, and Magic called  “I’ll Tell You My Sovereign Stories So You Can Tell Yours.”

Ultimately, that’s the whole reason I wrote my book. It’s the whole reason I’ve been living out loud on the internet for so many years.

As a fellow creative and healer, as a sister Sovereignty seeker, there’s a good chance you’re motivated by something similar. You tell your stories in order to help others see themselves and open their own doors, too. 

A huge part of being a good storyteller is rooted in being a good listener and a conscious consumer of information. That means you listen to your own inner voice and to the voices of others. It’s about honing your intuition and honing your craft. It’s about bringing empathy and compassion to the forefront of everything.

Years ago, before I even dared say “I’m going to write a book that blends memoir, myth, and my vision for modern women’s Sovereignty,” I published a weekly newsletter I called The Sovereign Standard. It was one of many iterations of that combination of collecting, sharing, and telling stories.

It’s time to bring that back…

Each Friday, I’ll share a small collection of articles, podcasts, books, and events that will help you live and tell a more powerful story. 

Good Reads

Love Keeps Me Sober is a tremendously brave and important story from Washington DC area therapist, soul coach, and Qoya movement teacher Erin Nes. I’ve been grateful to call Erin a friend, colleague, and client, and it’s with absolute admiration that I share her Sovereign story here.

How to Stand Sovereign When the Waves of Fear Crash Against Your Shores offers insight into how to use the archetypes of Sovereignty - the princess, the queen, and the wise woman - to stay strong and centered in the midst of the coronavirus panic.

Good Listens

Discover Your Sovereign Story: In this episode of the Soulfilled Sisterhood Podcast, Nicole Burgess and I dive deep into the meaning of Sovereignty, the origins of the Irish Sovereignty Goddess, and my own journey to writing The Sovereignty Knot.

How to Find a Sovereign Space Within Yourself: It was wonderful to return to Elizabeth Cush’s Woman Worriers Podcast to talk about the archetypes of Sovereignty and how standing Sovereign can help you access the Warrior within - even if you're still dealing with anxiety and other daily challenges.

Good Books

I HIGHLY recommend Anne Lamott’s 2018 book, Almost Everything. I missed it when it first came out. It's balm to the soul right now. 

Stories That Stick: How Storytelling Can Captivate Customers, Influence Audiences, and Transform Your Business by Kindra Hall is a great addition to any entrepreneur's library. 

Mark Your Calendar

Coming up on Saturday, March 28 in at The Living Seed in New Paltz, NY: the very first Sovereignty Knot book event! I am super excited (and more than a little nervous) to be celebrating the book’s release with a short performance. The archetypes of Sovereignty want to come alive beyond the page! 

This is all of the upcoming book events are here on my new events page.

Join us

Last item in this Sovereign Standard: about a quarter of the seats in my spring online program, Stand in Your Sovereign Story have been claimed by creative entrepreneurs and transformation professionals who want to use the art of storytelling to build world-changing businesses. We begin April 14. Get the early-bird pricing now!

How to Stand Sovereign When Waves of Fear Crash Against Your Shores

Sovereign isn’t a synonym for solitary. It’s got nothing to do with isolationism. Though Sovereignty does have everything to do with independence, it has just as much to do with interdependence, too.  

This passage from my new book, The Sovereignty Knot, is my modern feminist answer to that old bit of poetry from John Donne:

No man is an island entire of itself;
every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main

It feels particularly important to explore this dance between the personal and the collective as the world reacts not only to the actual spread of Coronavirus, but also to the fear of what might happen next.

We are all part of one another. We are all involved in this great continuum of life. To think that anyone is separate - either because they are so good, so terrible, or so inconsequential - is a dangerous illusion.

And yet, this understanding of our vital role in the collective does not diminish the powerful need to claim ourselves as individuals with our own inherent sense of worth. 

Though our society does not yet fully believe in and invest in the dignity of all people, that’s the ultimate goal. One of the reasons I get up every morning is because I am dedicated to creating a world in which every person and every story is allowed to matter.

The Dance of Independence and Interdependence in the Face of Contagion

Right now, as every newscast leads with headlines about the demise of stock markets and the closure of borders, we need to get clear on what Sovereignty really means.

We need to recognize that we play a vital part in the whole. And, we need to practice robust, focused self-awareness and self-care, all at the same time.

Yes, that means staying home if you’re sick, both to protect others from infection and to allow yourself to heal. 

And yes, that means refusing to lose yourself in the growing fear that will only worsen the situation.

It means practicing a mind-body-soul kind of Sovereignty in which you understand yourself to be part of the vast continent of humanity as well as a distinct individual with your own needs and your own sense of self.

Sovereignty In the Face of the Greatest Infection: Fear

I am not afraid of this virus. According to emerging accounts, many of us may have already been exposed to it and assumed it was just another seasonal flu. To be alive is to be at risk of death, and the risks associated with this particular illness are spectacularly small compared to the hype.

Edit: Ten days later, I see the inherent ableism in this comment.

I am breathing (with my healthy, fortunate lungs) into the discomfort. Instead of deleting it, I will say that I have learned a lot from those with suppressed immune systems and other underlying health concerns who are put in serious jeopardy by “just another seasonal flu” (that is statistically much more deadly).

I stand by the rest of this article. When it comes to my immediate family and myself, I am not afraid of the virus. That said, I am concerned about other relatives and, when I think about them in particular, “to be alive is to be at risk of death” feels too cavalier to be my heart’s truth.

Ok, back to the post as written on March 2.

What I am concerned about is the viral contagion of fear.

This kind of fear of the unknown, of the improbable but not impossible, seeps in and erodes your sense of peace and security.

This is the kind of fear that causes your sense of self to fall into the churning seas, regardless of whether you see yourself as a tiny island or as bit of shoreline. You feel ungrounded and lose your connection to the earth. You might find you become part of the tumult of collective disorientation.

This is the kind of fear that quickly shows you the strength (or lack of strength) of your Sovereign foundations.

Right now, it’s all too easy to lose track of your spiritual center, your creative vision, and your professional drive. You find yourself scrolling through social media, tripping from doomsday scenarios to “Don’t Worry Be Happy” memes.

In such an environment of collective worry verging on panic and utter discombobulation, we’re all at risk of losing track of our own intuition and our own sense of truth and self-trust. 

Sovereignty Is About Doing the Inner Work, But It’s Not About Doing It Alone

If you’ve come across my new book, The Sovereignty Knot: A Woman’s Way to Freedom, Power, Love, and Magic, you’ve met the three archetypes of Sovereignty: the princess, the queen, and the wise woman.

We all have these archetypes within us and we all have access to them, regardless of age. And in moments of societal stress, we need to be able to embody all three with greater ease and grace than ever before.  

Especially now, when so many people are so confused and don’t know what to do with their anxiety.

Especially now, when we aren’t quite sure our health system is prepared to handle an influx of sick people or whether our social fabric is strong enough to care for those who might suffer in all the disruption. 

Especially now, when women will be the ones who will end up offering care, either for the sick or for those in emotional pain. 

A Sovereign Remedy for this 2020 Dis-ease

If you’re new to my work, you may associate the word “sovereign” with nation states and politics. That’s the common usage today, but this multifaceted word glitters with many definitions associated with ancient myth and modern feminism.

There’s one particular dictionary definition of sovereign that’s obscure, but especially important here: the idea of having the “generalized curative powers” of a sovereign remedy. Once upon a time, peddlers sold nerve tonics and other herbal potions that promised to cure all ills. Certainly, there are laboratories around the world trying to mix up elixir that can eradicate this disease, but in the meantime, I have another solution:

Be your own sovereign remedy.

Look to the archetypes of Sovereignty and ask them to guide you as you respond to the the growing fear about the Coronavirus and what turmoil it may bring.

You may find you gravitate to one more than the others or that your particular situation calls you to stand in one energy more than others. I invite your to consciously step into relationship with all three. Embodying the princess, the queen, and the wise woman archetypes will help you not only withstand this moment in history but will enable you to stand as a lighthouse that shines over the waves.

Explore with your princess... Within all of us is a princess who is brave, optimistic, and brimming with vitality.

Rather than getting mired in the fear that shuts down the body and erodes your sense of connection, go out and play.

Put on a dress and go dancing. Grab your yoga mat and get to the studio. Be out in the world, refusing to be controlled by the monster that almost definitely does not lurk in the shadows.

(Edited to add: if the infection rate has increased so much that public gatherings just aren’t happening, put on that dress and dance in the new spring grass.)

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Follow your queen… Within all of us is a queen who is capable, responsible, and ready to manage any situation.

Rather than feeling helpless and paralyzed by your own concerns about what might happen if they really do close the schools and limit access to public spaces, make your plans.

Stock up on rice and beans and frozen kale. Make arrangements to work from home. Get real about how you will handle the financial hit that might come from this kind of widespread disruption.

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Listen to your wise woman… Within all of us is a wise woman who is still, insightful, and able to see the big picture.

Rather than feeling like the world is lost in some dystopian plot and deciding to turn your back on the world, remember your spiritual practices and your belief in a Greater Reality.

Get on your meditation cushion and say the mantras that make you feel centered. Kneel before your altar and send prayers to those who are on the front lines. Focus your healing energy on those who are besieged by the disease. Trust that your spiritual contribution to the collective energy field does make a difference.

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Learn How to Stand Sovereign In Your Life & Work

Want to know more about how to use these archetypes of Sovereignty to meet the challenges of everyday life?

If you’re a creative entrepreneur or a transformation professional who wants to know how to use the elements of Sovereignty to develop self-knowledge, share your message, and build your world-changing business, you belong in the Stand in Your Sovereign Story Program.